Life, stranger than fiction.

It is certainly true that life can be stranger than fiction but our norm is what we live by and we often forget that others may regard it as a little bit crazy!

On Sunday Zach had a day at home with us. He likes the odd day doing what he fancies and being in charge, it doesn’t matter how hard we try to redress the power balance, we live by Zach’s rules.

The day starts with me being told to get up, usually pretty early.

I come downstairs and sit at the table, Zach doesn’t like me going into the sitting room and there is a ritual which has to be performed if I do.

The ritual involves me being sat on the sofa and all the cushions thrown on the floor, I am then pinched on the cheek a few times. Not the worst but not the best so I do try to avoid it where possible.

How does Zach know I am in the sitting room? Because some of the floor boards creak and he always hears them and is up out of bed like a shot….

I have a number of pyjama tops which Zach likes me to wear, all various shades of pink and he takes me to change my top about every 15 minutes. Its not easy being tired and grumpy in our house as it all needs to be done with a smile!

Due to the pressures of being micro managed and not allowed to move unless told to I usually nip out for a few hours just to try and hang on to the last crumbs of sanity I  have.

It goes like this, all three of us go out for a drive as requested by Zach, the route determined by Zach. When we get back to the house, John and Zach always have to go for another drive, a longer one which means I should have time to shower, dress, get my bike out and nip off to see my Dad.

I come into the house and charge up the stairs for my shower, wash the bits that count and quickly dry myself, I am up against the clock! Drag my clothes on my still damp body and take a quick peek out of the bedroom window and ……they are back!

They have only been gone about 10 minutes, I charge downstairs and go out of the backdoor, locking it behind me. I have shoes, clothes but my hair is wild underneath the hat I wear to avoid getting my hair pulled and no key, phone or bag.


I stand out of sight behind our shed and listen….they are coming into the house and not going for the usual walk!

Zach will usually go upstairs to relax and play music but I can hear him downstairs, listening to Mika. I can hear John upstairs as a window is open so I bide my time and clean my bike (which hasn’t been done in about 3 years) as I find it hard to be idle and just do nothing!

I keep peeking around the corner of the shed to see if I can see John to let him know I am there, I see Zach dancing around eating his breakfast, I dart back, fortunately he doesn’t see me.

My mind wanders back to when my Nursing Tutor told me he thought I should join up to one of the armed forces the Army, Navy or Royal Air Force. He thought that because I liked sport and it would be ideal for me. What he didn’t realise is that I didn’t want to live a life being told what to do by someone else….hold on…

So there I am, feeling like I am surveying the house, staking out while I clean my bike. I knew I wasn’t right for the Armed forces.

We have a woodshed which has slats just next to the shed and as it isn’t full I could squat down by it and peek through the slats to see into the kitchen. John usually spends time pottering about in the kitchen on a weekend morning, just not today it would seem.

After what felt like an eternity, I can’t hear Zach’s music anymore and I think he may have gone upstairs but I don’t want to blow my cover so stay hidden behind the woodshed. I peek through the slats and see John in the kitchen bending over to put washing in the machine.

He turns and he sees me, he looks a bit alarmed. I signal to ask if Zach is upstairs and he silently nods. He unlocks the back door and passes me out the bits I need and off I go.

Fortunately its a windy day so I can (possibly) excuse my hair to anyone I see.

th hair

I pedal off down the road feeling victorious!

I have a nice visit to my Dad, he talks to me about his days in the Royal Marines and I think he would have been proud of me this morning.

When I get home I know what will happen and am ready for it.

Zach will ask me what is happening tomorrow and I will tell him that Maggie and Paul are coming to get him in the morning and he will tell me to go to bed to make the morning come more quickly.

OIP pjs

I am back in my pyjamas which is what Zach requires and have to change my pj top a good few times before the day is out. I sometimes rebel a little and try to get downstairs but Zach comes to find me and sends me back to bed.

Around 5 O’clock Zach passes me my uniform for work, I start at 6 but am sure there is stuff I can do on the work intranet while I wait.

Work over, and I am prompted to get back into my pj’s and get into bed for the final time today.

With the exception of being stuck outside in limbo between going out and staying in, it was a normal day.

OIPTM6FHLMN fam photo

Life, stranger than fiction? I think so.